Read 1 Corinthians Chapter Six. Did you know that divorce papers are written up as a law suit? My church home allowed my wife to sue me for divorce and disobeyed this instruction. They did absolutely nothing to try and save our marriage even with my persistent pleads for them to do so. They would not allow me to defend myself against the false charges my wife filed against me much like what Nancy Pelosi and the House Democrats are doing to President Trump in their impeachment process. They never considered me to be innocent until proven guilty which is the law. Be fore warned, the women who control the narrative in this church have a mob mentality. This is same kind of vindictive behavior we saw demonstrated up close and personal against Judge Brett Kavanaugh during his nomination for Supreme Court Justice.
Jesus said... "If you love me you will obey my teachings."
This was my experience at the Southern Baptist Church here in Oviedo, FL. This proves they do not practice what they preach which is the most concise definition of a hypocrite. First Baptist Church in Oviedo (now Crosslife) allowed my former wife to steal my most valuable possession from me. What is anyone's most valuable possession? It's obviously our family. You can't put a price tag on this loss because it is priceless!
My former wife and Crosslife Church of Oviedo turned our three daughters against me by making me out to be an abusive alcoholic father. My abuse of alcohol got me in trouble with a one time domestic abuse altercation with one of our daughters. What ever happened to Three Strikes and you are out? I admit the dumbest things I have ever done in life has been under the influence of alcohol. I admit I was extremely wrong in starting to drink again because I am an alcoholic who has pledged in the past to never take another drink. This incident happened in December of 2004. Christmas with my family was indefinitely terminated from this point on because of my wife's extreme prejudicial actions she demonstrated towards me.
I stopped drinking in 1995 because of a DUI. I could have hired a good attorney to reduce it to a reckless driving offense but my conscience would not let me. I plead guilty because I was guilty of the charges against me. I was court ordered to attend mandatory AA meetings. I stayed sober for nine years until this incident happened. Please note I was not found guilty of the criminal charge my wife, Jan, filed against me. What I did was wrong but it was not what I was accused of. My attorney and I agreed to work a plea deal to keep this from going to a public trial to protect the reputation and integrity of our family legacy. This was the most pragmatic resolution in addressing this tragedy. Don't you think if I was guilty of this crime I would have gone to prison? Did you watch what Pontius Pilate did in the movie, "The Passion of Christ"?
Please note that my wife Jan's brother David was accused of the same crime but his wife Eve refused to press charges. Who was more Christ-like in how they handled this similar incident, Jan or Eve?
I really do believe that our daughter Shelly knows deep down in her heart that I am innocent of the accusation my wife, Jan, made against me. Shelly lost both of her fathers because of her mother’s UNFORGIVENESS of her past husband’s sins. Shelly’s biological father Dave was arrested for shop lifting merchandise from Best Buy. I was accused and arrested for a onetime domestic abuse altercation that was greatly exaggerated. My wife divorced me because of this incident. The amount of shame and condemnation that came from my wife Jan and all her cronies at Crosslife church was over whelming. The shame was unbearable for Dave Webb, my first wife's husband. He committed suicide because of all the vitriolic prejudice directed towards him. Thank God I am still alive. I credit God for the tremendous amount of faith he blessed me with. I would not have endured without it.
My sister Nancy told me our daughter Shelly no longer wants to have anything to do with her mom. This is the same kind of extreme prejudice and vitriolic behavior you see demonstrated towards our President. The motivation behind this prejudice is demonic in my opinion. I can't imagine anyone having this prejudicial mindset without it being demonic. Can you?
Let me ask you some questions... Have you ever been falsely accused of doing something that you know you did not do? Was Joseph accused of a crime that he did not do? Was Jesus accused of of blasphemy a sin punishable by death? Has our President been accused of many things that he did not do? Did you ever stop to consider that maybe I might have been falsely accused as well? Have you seen the evidence or lack there of in the criminal charge filed by my wife against me?
I admit that I have a history of substance abuse because I suffer from severe depression PTSD which was diagnosed while serving in the Navy in 1974. I am considered a disabled vet because of this. I have chosen to self-medicate to relieve my sorrows in the past because anti-depressant drugs were not available at the time. Most Vietnam Vets such as myself have a history of substance abuse. My drug of choice was marijuana while serving in the Navy but chose not to use it at the time of this domestic abuse accusation because it was illegal. All of my former shipmates had a drug of choice. You had your acid freaks, your speed freaks and your pot heads as we called them back then. All of us drank a lot when we frequented the local bars looking for beautiful ladies to chase. Of course when you are drunk, every woman is beautiful, right? We use to say when out at sea for a long time, "I'm so horny I could fuck a snake!" I know for a fact that those who are offended by this quote have their head up their "sanctimonious ass". Just so you know, I could give a flying flip about what these sanctimonious ass holes think because I am not responsible for what they think. Jesus will set everything straight when we meet Him one day. Jesus is my boss, not those (mostly women) who dictate doctrine at Crosslife Church in Oviedo.
I would have never been guilty of any domestic abuse if I was high on marijuana instead of drunk on alcohol. I am much more conscientious of right and wrong, sometimes to the point of paranoia, when I am using marijuana as my drug of choice. Ask any mental health expert and they will tell you the importance of staying on your medication when suffering from a mental disorder such as PTSD. Have you noticed the double standard that exists in the mindset of many people who discriminate against the use of marijuana as their drug of choice? Most of these people are women if you have not noticed. Remember Prohibition? It gained it's national grass roots base through the Woman's Christian Temperance Union." What a sanctimonious brood of vipers these women were...agreed?
This is a text book example of where we as a "One Nation Under God" DO NOT LEARN FROM OUR PAST MISTAKES!
Alcohol consumption is a different story. Studies have proven that the use of alcohol severely impairs our judgement and is the number one drug responsible for the destruction of the family nucleus in our country today and NOT MARIJUANA!
I speak from much practical experience that alcohol is a much more dangerous drug than marijuana. There is no way you can convince me otherwise.
Ask John Morgan in Orlando about the medical benefit of marijuana. I grew up with John, he is a close friend with my cousin Bob Kuykendall formerly of Kuykendall Insurance in Winter Park, FL. John graduated from Winter Park High and I graduated from Edgewater High School the same year. We are both alcoholics and have attended AA meetings together in the past. I have never been a fan of Personal Injury Attorneys like John Morgan, however, he is right on the issue of Medical Marijuana. Please use google to see how beneficial marijuana is to those who suffer from PTSD such as myself. Let me add some more stats on the benefit of medical marijuana and how it has reduced crime in the states that have legalized the use of it. While in the Navy, I use to think and still do, that if every one used marijuana instead of alcohol as their personal drug of choice the likelihood of war would be minimal. Even Judge Jeanine Pirro of Fox News knows how beneficial Marijuana is to many medical conditions both physical and mental.
This whole Thesis has been written while taking my prescribed medication of marijuana. Do I seem impaired to you as you read what I have written? I can attest to the fact that marijuana works much more effectively than Prozac which I took for many years until it no longer worked. I much rather consume something that is God made rather than a man made synthetic drug like Prozac, wouldn’t you? We call this "organic" in today's terminology. I wonder if Prozac damaged my liver?
As you should know, Southern Baptist's are Teetotaler's and supported my wife divorcing me and made me look like and abusive alcoholic father in the minds of our daughters.
Many people at Crosslife maligned my reputation with malicious gossip about me. They made my wife Jan look like a Saint and they made me look like the devil. My attorney tells me that there are grounds for a law suit against this church for slander and defamation of character but I refuse to sue because of Paul’s instruction in First Corinthians Chapter Six which Crosslife church failed to obey. Feminists are doing the same thing to our President. Can't you see this?
To this day my daughters refuse to correspond with me. Now all of my Holidays and special occasions are spent all alone with no family to celebrate them with. Christmas is the most depressing time of the year for me. Why? What is Christmas without family? My daughter Hannah did not invite me to her High School graduation, a special occasion that no parent should miss. Do you see how disrespectful this was towards me as her Father? Now I am sure Hannah will not have me walk her down the aisle when she marries, and I probably will never see my grandchildren as well. Hell couldn’t be much worse than this, could it?
We should never forget what Jesus said while hanging on the cross...
I pray God will forgive my wife and my daughters because they do not realize that their lack of forgiveness towards me is an unforgivable sin. The Jesus that my wife and three daughters know is not the same Jesus that I know. This is why I fear Jesus will say to them when they meet Him...
Jesus also said... "What God has put together, LET NO MAN SEPARATE!"
My first wife, Jan, knows that God put us together and she still divorced me because she was more concerned about what the people (mostly women) at First Baptist (Crosslife) Oviedo were saying about me than what Jesus teaches us in the Bible. She would rather please people than please our Heavenly Father.
Divorce is the ultimate act of unforgiveness. Is there an act more unforgiving than divorce? What if God decides to divorce us after He has adopted us as His child? Did you ever stop to think about that? Prior to all this happening, many people at Crosslife Church Oviedo despised me because of certain things I have said during group discussions concerning church growth decline as stated in this thesis. This is especially true when discussing point three in my thesis.
Jesus said a Prophet is not honored in his home town. It is note worthy to mention that several church leaders in my past, including Pastor Herb Long who officiated the wedding ceremony with my first wife, say I have the gift of prophecy. I have come to believe that this is true about me. Charles Stanley has the best interpretation on what the gift of prophecy is in my my opinion. My definition of this gift is very simple...
A prophet "professes truth" when everyone else professes lies.
I am also using Point Twenty-Two to state my defense in the accusations my wife made against me that contributed to her suing me for divorce. I was not allowed to do so at Crosslife Church. I asked for a formal meeting with the Pastors and Deacons (no Elders at this church) to share my side of the story but they would not allow it. I also confronted Charles Wise (a member of Crosslife Church at the time) and owner of Pathway Counseling in Oviedo (a shame-based counseling ministry). I wanted him to hear my side of he story on what happened that got me arrested and incarcerated at the Seminole County Jail. My wife, Jan, had him counsel our daughter, Shelly, after my only domestic abuse altercation with her. Charles would not return my calls so I had to find him at a Sunday Morning service so I could confront him about his disobedience to God’s Word on how to resolve personal conflict in the church. I chased him down after the service to ask why he would not return my calls and he turned his back on me, put his tail between his legs and ran off like a scared rabbit. He did not have the balls to have a man to man with me. I call him the "Pillsbury Dough Boy". He had already made up in his mind that I was guilty of the charges filed against me. Is this a fair and balanced treatment by a supposed brother in the Lord? His prejudicial hatred towards me was very apparent with the lack of love and respect he demonstrated towards me. There is no doubt in my mind that the Jesus Charles Wise knows is the same Jesus I know. Do you think what happened to me would be the way Jesus would have handled this? WWJD
Please put your prejudices aside and BE HONEST with your thoughts... Can you believe Charles Wise is an Elder at Waterstone Church in Oviedo? Everyone in my defense must know that I did everything I could possibly do to save our marriage. My wife says she has forgiven me. It's obvious by my former wife's actions (the act of divorce) that she has not forgiven me for my past offenses to her and our daughters as she perceives them. I admitted my mistakes to her and OUR daughters. I apologized and asked for them to forgive me. I promised to make things right in the future. I even put this in writing. I sincerely meant what I said.
A question for my wife Jan… did you read what I wrote earlier in describing the mindset of an idealist in Point Six that their words carry more weight than their actions? This would be like Jesus saying to us when we meet Him on judgement day, "I forgive you, but, you still have to spend eternity in hell". Ask our daughter Shelly if her mom, Jan, told her not to forgive me when I apologized and asked her to forgive me right after this incident.
In closing this point out, I would like to leave a note to my first wife, Jan. I hope you read this thesis. I am very open to you coming back to me and restoring our marriage relationship. I miss my family more than any thing in this world. You must be honest and transparent with me in confessing the mistakes you made in our marriage with your act of divorcing me being the most egregious. I confessed my mistakes to you and our daughters and suffered immensely because of them. Now it's time you admit your mistakes against me and seek restitution. God will forgive you if you do. I already have forgiven you because I know you are under the influence of the demonic spirit of feminist ideology as are most women who attend church today. Also, please tell Shelly I still have the Best of the "Doobie Brothers" CD she loved so much.
Jan, you will recall the fact that God told me you would be my future wife when He woke me up in the middle of the night told me I would marry a woman who was born and raised in Leesburg, FL. He also revealed to you in your morning devotion on the night you invited me over for dinner that I am a good man. Don't you remember? Don't forget about the glass pumpkins as well. My personal opinion is that their is no such thing as a good man because I am not one of them.
The only good man that ever lived was Jesus of Nazareth...
Jeanie Wilson was a close friend of my wife Jan at the time of our divorce. She told me that Jan made a list of everything she wanted in her future husband. She told me she did not understand why Jan did not put on her list someone she would fall madly in love with. I think you know now why Jan never loved me. She did not put LOVE on her list.
Here is another person of interest…there is only one woman who attended First Baptist Church Oviedo at the time of our divorce who I believe looks at what happened with Jan and me with the mindset of Jesus. Her name is Candy Calhoun. What a sweet lady she is. Her daughter is just as sweet. Ken did well to marry her. Candy and I got to know each other on our mission trip as a Choir Member to Brazil. We sat together on a bus that was taking us to a remote town to sing in their town square. Candy, if you read this, I would like for you and Ken to call me and talk about this. I sent a letter in the mail to Ken to call but he did not respond. I find this very troubling. I also sent other letters by mail to Rick Hall, Randy Core and Rick Freeman. They did not respond as well… I found Rick Hall's cell phone number and have had a conversation with him since. I was surprised to hear he is attending Dallas Theological Seminary.
Jan, let me add this disclaimer...please don't come back to me if you need another Sugar Daddy to support your financial needs. I know one of your addictions is the love of money. As long as you are in denial of your own addictions, we will never have an intimate relationship in our marriage. It's time to humble yourself and confess your mistakes and commit yourself to not making the same mistakes again. I have admitted my mistakes to you and our daughters and truly have repented from them. It is time for you to do the same with me as your husband. I consider you to be my better half. I will have a hard time accepting you back if your feelings towards me are not mutual. Do you understand what I mean by mutual? President Trump calls this reciprocal. Do you remember the old saying, "it takes two to tango?" Here is one Spiritual truth I have learned about love...
"Love will never grow unless it's mutual."
Jan, I have another confession to make to you. I made the same mistake you did in why you chose me to be your husband. I married Elena because I wanted a mother for Hannah. You married me because you wanted a father for Megan and Shelly. You did not marry me for love and that was your biggest mistake! It was also my biggest mistake in marrying Elena. Can't you see we all make costly mistakes in life? It's whether or not we admit them that will determine how transparent we are with each other. When I look back to our honeymoon, our love making did not seem right. Originally, I thought something was wrong with me in my love making skills. Now I know why it did not seem right. You never really loved me in a romantic sense. Of course in your mind, I was the cause for the lack of romance in our relationship.
My Grandfather Pemble taught me that actions always speak louder than words. Jan, if you had truly forgiven me, we would still be married today. Like Jesus, I hate the sin of hypocrisy especially when you say one thing and do another. Our American Indians call this speaking with forked tongue. All hypocrites have a double standard in their mindset. This is what the Bible refers to as being double-minded.
What I just described to you is a perfect example where my former wife's words, saying she has forgiven me, carry more weight than her act of divorcing me.
I was 44 years old and never married when I met my wife, Jan, in 1996 at First Baptist (Crosslife) Church in Oviedo in their Singles Ministry. She was the one who always prepared the morning coffee in which I was much obliged. I heard she was a widow which sparked my interest in her for two reasons. One, she was a widow and Jesus explicitly commands us to take care of widows and orphans and two, she was not divorced. The Bible says if a man marries a divorced woman he would be guilty of adultery.
The two dirtiest words in my vocabulary are HYPOCRISY and DIVORCE and not any four letter word. What are the dirtiest words in your vocabulary?
Actions do speak much louder than our words! There is no way we can use God's Word to refute this spiritual fact of life. We know this is true but too often we are too ashamed to admit it. Being too ashamed to admit our wrongdoings is called DENIAL in addiction recovery groups such as Alcoholics Anonymous. My Psychiatrist, Dr. Birkmire, and my Psychotherapist Dr. Hobby, encouraged my wife, Jan, to attend AA meetings with me. She refused to follow their wise advice.
To my wife, Jan ... As long as you continue to deny your own faults, you will continue to be a SELF RIGHTEOUS HYPOCRITE! Don't forget the sin that angered Jesus the more than any other is the sin of hypocrisy.
I hope my total transparency in making this point pays off to prove how productive and beneficial real honesty is.
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